If not you, then who?
A poem by Sean Kathryn Bratton
Ask me if I’ve been running, I won’t tell a lie. Ask me if I take off, I’ll give hints as to why.
I too easily jump ship, pack my bags and set out for a trip. I too easily become numb, flee the scene, prepare my lungs. I take off first, I don’t look twice, I jump on three, I don’t need a reason why.
When the pressure arises, when I feel the heat, I take what’s mine and go beyond the trees. My body present, my mind lost at sea, up and down among the waves, spiraling into conch shells, getting lost in the breeze. My cognitive working, my consciousness in a melting pot, deep in the witch’s forest, gathering hints beyond the fog, stirring until its fluid, until it’s something burning hot.
Fight or flight? I jumped the plane before you could ask why. Fawn or freeze? You could never find me to know which I’ll be.
Staying home base is something I’m learning. I wasn’t even aware of this until my character started burning.
No easy way out, only one way in, abandon my character and I’ll never win. Through the mud, through the valley, through the trenches of all that makes me rowdy. She asks me to stay, she needs me by her side, it is only when we become one do we see the other side.
Every time I turn away, she feels alone and shame. Every time I close my eyes, she feels defeated and small inside. Every time I dismiss and shut the door, she feels unworthy of love, insignificant and sore.
Don’t run, stay. Make light of it, try to play. Don’t leave, just be, take the scenic route, stop for drinks. Love out loud, let yourself be free, drop every notion of how you think it should be. Don’t flee, stay and see. Live your dream, stay for love, we both know your true reality. Don’t stray off, stay the course, you know this route, you’ve been here before. Ditch your running shoes, wear stilettos, hold your character’s hand, love and don’t let go. Hold her hand, dream your dream, take off together, set off to sea.
Worth it, through the cold and through the dark. Worth it, keep your eyes among the stars. Worth it, in every moment, every day. Worth it, keep your heart on your love to show you the way.
No dark night too dreary, no fallen star too gone, no trench or valley will be where you stop. These are merely contrast, a tuning of your song, hard missions to show you just how strong.
Pick yourself back up, reunite once again. Hold her hand, kiss her and be her best friend.
If not you, then who? If now now, then when? If not forever, then never?
Keep going, you’re at the best part. Keep going, you’re on the bridge to your heart. Keep going, in time you’ll see. Keep going you’re becoming who you’re meant to be.
